This topic is quite sensitive because this is between you and your emotion. The reason why you ended up here is because you need some advise on how to get rid of that shitty feeling you have inside your chest, I’ll help but you need to help yourself out too honey, Okay?
When I was in grade school, my teacher taught me about the stages of grieving, in other words, the stages where one has to forget something painful. However, it depends how much time a person spent in every stage, how heavy the situation is and the willingness to move on, but don’t worry, eventually you will, it’s only a matter of time. Originally, I would write the five steps in grieving process, First, DENIAL, ANGER, BARGAINING, DEPRESSION and finally ACCEPTANCE but since it’s stereotypical to discuss these steps over and over again to anyone, I will help you out by sharing my personal advise on how to deal with it.
1. LISTING ALL THE BAD THINGS ABOUT HAVING THE RELATIONSHIP.
-List all the ugly things about the person and all the other things that makes you feel worst with that person while being in the relationship. Check out the bad habits, the values, physical, the way he make you feel, the ugly mannerisms, whatever. Anything that can make the person look ugly in your eyes. You’re hurt, you need to do this until you finally ask yourself, why did I even end up with this monster?
2. NEVER EVER BEG FOR LOVE.
– So you can’t let go because you’re still in-love with your ex? So do you want to have your ex back out of sympathy? Do you honestly believe that you can make things work this time? Aside from wasting both of your time, you’re also postponing both progress and who knows? While you’re busy with all the begging for attention, you also let amazing things pass? And not only that, it’s just very selfish and pathetic to emotionally blackmail a person like what I’ve watched from ID channel, about murderers who ended up serving their lives in prison because they believed in the famous saying: “If I can’t have you, then no one can!”That is another level of psychopathic activity. Go see a doctor. If this is what you do, it’s extremely selfish and pathetic, don’t even continue reading my blog.
3. MAKE OVER.
-Take the mirror, Tell me what you see. Do you see a person or a pathetic monkey? Go fix your hair, take a shower, clean your room, go to the gym, take advantage of the situation, it’s a good motivation and perfect momentum to make over and become an endangered creature. After this, you’ll see how everyone will be like with you once you’re looking like a kick-ass-single and ready-or-not-ready to mingle-(doesn’t matter)-they will mingle anyway.
4. GO OUT.
–So it’s over? It hurts because it sucks to start all over again and that no matter how much you wanted the person for your future and the amount of time with that person, it just can’t anymore because it’s not gonna work. Like you have never slept on the same bed and never knew each other. Being Strangers again. What you can do is go out with your friends, go out with anyone, it doesn’t matter, just go out and see something new. See the world, open doors, refresh your self. All the things you were wishing to do alone, this is your chance. No matter how ugly the situation is, I guarantee, you will always find good reasons that it happened, and stick to those reasons, think of it over and over again. Imagine if you would get back together, then what, break up again? It’s like playing flappy birds, it’s feels good to pass at least 10 to many pipes, but to hit the same pipe over and over again and always end up to level one? Don’t waste time, Go play another game.
5. FIND SOMEONE YOU CAN USE AS REBOUND/S
–No matter how nasty this way is, it always worked. Find a rebound. After few months you will be completely fine. Just be careful.
6. STOP STALKING HIM. INSTEAD, MAKE YOUR LIFE MORE INTERESTING.
–You’ve already wasted enough time with the person, please save yourself. Do something more sensible, be you, enjoy your freedom, change your way, be the ultimate independent happy woman-all over again. Pick up your pieces and create a new more interesting masterpiece. AND DON’T ever lose yourself again.
And for all pain, there’s always an amazing lesson and beautiful impact in your life to be stronger and better and wiser, you have to face every damn pain to appreciate sweet life and never ever give up on yourself. Life is beautiful depending on what perspective you are facing, always find a good reason to love life, and life will love you back. We are humans, we fall in-love, we get hurt and hurt people, that’s the way it is, we have to be tough and get familiar with the system of being us.